Oh Happy Day!!

I finished up my Action Research Project last week. I emailed it to my professor early to make sure I gotthe extra 10 bonus points. I figured I would need those bonus points to possibly squeak out an A in the class. This was my last class before finishing up my Masters. Up to this point I had made an A in every class. Each day since hit the "submit" button on my paper, I have obsessively checked Blackboard to see what my grade end up being.

I checked last night before I went to bed...and still nothing. So, this morning I thought, "Maybe the guy is a night owl and he got it done last night." I didn't really think it would be there. But, low and behold...there it was. 408/600...408/600? "What? REALLY?" I immediately started number crunching. That is a 68%---F in the graduate world. I looked at the comment section and it read, "Krista, I have graded your paper and it and the scoring rubric will be sent to you via an email attachment. Your paper is outstanding. Good job. Dr. Brandly"

I did what every emotional woman would do I began hysterically sobbing. I sent my hubby a text because I couldn't get any words out....and of course, he calls me...just as any good husband would. But, I couldn't talk. I just kept saying, "I worked so hard..."

Halle got up and just listened and watched as I cried. She asked me why I was crying and I tried to explain to her that the teacher didn't like my homework. She asked me if I got kicked out of school and if my boss was mad at me. I might sometimes use the boss thing to get her out of the house in the mornings...oops! Sorry, Tim! :/

So, I calmed down enough to get to school. My friend across the hall has taken every class with me and she was very sympathetic. She kept saying..."that just can't be right." Her and my other friend, Annie convinced me to go ahead and email him to see why he said it was outstanding but gave me an F. So, I did. In about an hour I checked back and the grade had changed to 608/600.

I was soooooo relieved! I checked my email and Dr. Brandly sent me an apology and then asked me if he could use my paper as a sample in his next class. That was very much an honor. All the blood, sweat...and actual tears was so worth it.

I went to pick up Halle from daycare and her teacher informed me that she was real whiny today. She said she kept talking about me...very worried that I was still upset. She told her, "I tried to tell Mommy that her teacher isn't mad at her." I never gave it much thought at all that me being upset would affect her so much. Kids are so in tune with us. How we begin our day really does set the tone for their day. I felt bad for ruining Halle's day. It was a great reminder to put on my happy face...no matter what. Sometimes it is just so hard!!

"I've Got This!"

Halle is 3 going on 13. Here lately she has been spending a lot of time with teenagers and I think they are starting to rub off on her a bit. I find her sometimes sitting in front of a mirror brushing her hair. She cares about what she wears...ALREADY! I figured this out just this past week. I sent her to daycare in a pair of sandals. I always send an extra pair of shoes to wear on the playground. I sent a pair of crocs because they are so easy to slide on and off and you just can't mess them up. When I got there to pick her up, I found out she had a little shoe mishap with her cute sandals. I said, "Ok, Halle let's just put on your crocs and get out to the car." She responded, "No, Mom...these shoes are just sooo ugly." Wow! Of course, they are ugly! I've never owned a pair of crocs because this reason. But, the fact that my 3 year old daughter has realized this is just strange to me!

Halle has become very independant! And I think it's safe to say that I don't like it one bit. She's my baby! I want to help her get dressed. Put her shoes on. Fix her hair. Give her a bath. Pick out her clothes. I want to help her wash her hands. Here lately, she says, "No, Mom! I can do it." It makes me sad and I feel helpless at times.

This made me think...I wonder if that is how God feels when we do things on our own? So many times we find ourselves saying, "I've got this! I can do this on my own."

Last Monday...when I got the phone call about my mom's surgery...I immediately began praying. I sent a message to my close friends to get them praying. They reminded me that this was a routine procedure and everything was going to be o.k. Still, I didn't feel good about it. I didn't make it to the hospital before they took her back. I will never forget the feeling that came over me when the surgeon came in to tell us what he had found. I realized at that point...it wasn't "routine." I promise you...I was not saying, "I can do this on my own"....or..."I've got his." I was pleading to Him, "Please God, don't take my Momma! I need her. Halle needs her Nana!" I felt so helpless sitting there for over 2 hours. I am so thankful that He saw fit to keep her alive! I realized how quickly my life could have changed in that instant.

I am so thankful that we don't have to do it ALL on our own! I think it is always important to remember that just as I want to help Halle out....God wants to help us! It doesn't matter how big or small our problem seems to us, it is NEVER a big deal to Him!

Traditions...It's a working progress!

Last year on Easter, Jake was out of town doing storm work. So, I played the Easter bunny by myself. It was very sad. I had to put together the new red wagon by myself and ended up putting the wheels on backwards. :/ HAHA! It was very funny! I also hid all of the eggs.

So, this year Jake is home. I woke him up this morning to tell him to go hide the eggs before Halle woke up. So, he got up. I didn't understand why he went into the closet and got dressed...but whatever! After he got back in bed I decided to get up to check to make sure he did it right. And to also get the the Easter basket things and get it all set out and ready to go. I started looking around and didn't see any eggs. I thought, "Wow, he sure hid them good for a 3 year old!"

Halle got up and ran to see what was in her basket. She was so excited with every item. There was gum and she knew that Jake was looking for gum last night and she said, "Daddy, I think he left this for you." It was so sweet!

On to the Egg hunt.

So, I had Halle get her basket and told her it was time to find her eggs. I said, "Wow, I think the Easter bunny must have hid the eggs "really" hard. I don't see ANY. Jake looked at me like I was stupid and said, "That's because the Easter bunny hides the eggs OUTSIDE! Bahahaha!

Needless to say we've GOT to get on the same page with these traditions. I've never heard of the Easter bunny hiding eggs outside. I mean why would he do that? Your feet get all nasty and it is always cold. But, whatever!! LOL!! We always had the eggs hidden inside of our house. But, I'm o.k.with new traditions. Halle had so much fun!

Happy Easter!

Testimony of Faith

I've been in church my entire life. So, when I hear people talking about their testimony, I always wish I had an exciting one to share. Sure, the fact that Jesus died for me and I now have salvation is just as exciting as anything I could ever imagine. But, I've always heard so many testimonies that just seem absolutely amazing to me. Here lately, I feel that God is doing an amazing work in my life. He has stretched my faith beyond what I could ever have imagined. I would like to share my testimony. I will call it my "Testimony of Faith" because I have complete confidence that He isn't over with me yet and I know, by faith, there is so much more to come in our lives!

I asked Jesus into my heart in 1988 at a Jimmy Swaggert revival in Baton Rouge. I was 7 years old and I will never forget that life changing moment when I decided I wanted to follow Christ and make heaven my home. As I said before, my parents raised my brothers and I in church our entire lives. I can probably count on one hand the number of services we may have missed. We were always expected to go to church. Even in our rebellious teenage years! I say rebellious only because I didn't always make the best choices in my life. There were times when I strayed away.

I was 21 when I had a complete life change. I had just met my husband and he was a youth pastor. I had never dated anybody like him before. I guess that is why I fell so hard for him and why we are now married. He had a heart after God. My desires changed. Before I met him I didn't really think too much about God. I lived for myself. I did what made me happy in life. Sure, I believed in Him...I believed He died for me and I knew I was saved but I also knew there was so much more for my life. My mom had always told me that I had a calling on my life. It went in one ear and out the other. I heard it my whole life. But, all of a sudden I had this heart change. I started realizing that life was so much more than what I hadever experienced before.

I believe that God had a devine appointment for Jake and I to meet. I have no doubt that he orchestrated everything in our lives that led up to that moment where he came to my parents house all heart broken.

Fast forward almost 8 years later...

We have been "trying" to expand our family for almost a year now. When we decided it was time (June 2011) we were at a place spiritually that seemed to me, very stale or stagnant. We weren't involved in ministry. We were "pew warmers." Not that there is ANYTHING wrong with that but, we both knew there was so much more for us. That God had called us to do something other than what we were doing.

In January 2012, I had this reality check "moment." I had just taken a pregnancy test (as I had all the previous months) and it was negative. I just didn't understand why God wasn't blessing us. We had several things happen this particular day and I finally just broke. I remember sitting in the floor of the bathroom sobbing as Jake just sat and watched. He didn't know what to say. He didn't have to say anything. I just remember speaking these words through my sobs, "What did we do to deserve this?" I think it hit both of us...we were NOT where we were supposed to be spiritually. He lead us back to The Missing Peace church. We had no intentions of taking over any ministry there. But, we felt the urgency to go back. The last time we were at this church the ministry positions were all filled. We didn't really know why we were supposed to go, afterall we were so comfortable at Harvest. That was where all of our friends were....where we had gone our whole lives. But, we were obediant and about a month later the youth ministry sort of fell into our laps.

In February, we had some testing done and we were told that there was a very slight chance we would conceive naturally. This was a little hard to swallow. Afterall, we have our precious Halle with no trying at all. I have not accepted what doctors have told us. Because I know the best fertility specialist there is...His name is Jesus! As I sit and type this today, I am still not pregnant. But, I have COMPLETE faith that I will be in HIS time. Over the course of this year I have waited patiently while 21 people that I know either got positive tests or had a baby. While that may seem discouraging for most, I find myself very content with life. It has taken lots of prayer to get to this place of peace. My focus has changed...instead of praying for God to give me, give me, give me...I have thanked Him for all He has blessed me with. I have finally surrendered completely. It is completely out of my control. I will continue to stand on my faith and trust in the LORD. I have to say, that when it happens, it will truly be my TESTIMONY OF FAITH. I will finally have my amazing testimony that I have always hoped for...and to God will be the glory.