Brantley: Part 2--NICU

We had our baby boy on Sunday, May 26. Just one day shy of Halle's 5th Birthday. We celebrated Halle's birthday in the hospital. I had tried not stressing about her party because I knew babies are unpredictable and there was no use in trying to plan an extravagant party. I purchased her gifts a week prior and had everything in the basement ready to be wrapped. I kept telling myself to get them wrapped but I really thought I had plenty of time.

Jake left the hospital with Halle on Sunday night so he had strict orders to get the presents wrapped and bring me some things that I left at home. She came in and we had a Birthday Party for her with cupcakes and presents.

Birthday Girl

Monday, May 27 we had a few visitors in the hospital. My dad, mom, Aunt Sarah, Caleb & Eli came to visit. Then, Uncle Bobby, Aunt Jennifer, Alex, Ashley & Abby. We had a few of our youth stop by (Brittany, Amanda, Kylie & Josh) Last, was Jeremy, Amy, Jozlyn and Stephanie!

Jake and Halle decided to stay the night with me our last night because it was silly to drive home so late and then turn around to come back and pick us up. So, they slept on a very uncomforable couch. I sent Brantley to the nursery in hopes of getting one last chance at a good night's rest. Around 3 a.m. I had a nurse and a doctor in my room. The nurse literally had to shake me to get me awake. I was soooo out of it. They said that B had some irregular breathing and they wanted to send him to the NICU for a couple of days to monitor it. They did a chest x-ray and it showed a little something so they wanted to get him on antibiotics just in case of infection. I was so happy that Jake decided to stay because he was able to hear them explain everything. They were very calm and acted like it wasn't a huge deal. I am pretty sure if Jake hadn't been with me I would have been a basket case!

I got up around 6 and got a shower and headed down to the NICU. I wasn't prepared at all for what I would see. My poor little baby hooked to machines with nothing but a diaper on under a warmer.

I just cried and prayed. I had no idea what was going on and nobody really could give us any answers.

I was discharged on Tuesday and we were able to get a room at the Ronald McDonald House since we lived over 50 miles away. Thank God! My mom offered to stay with me so Jake could go back to work. Remember, he only wanted to take of 1 day of work! LOL! It was better that he go on to work because there really wasn't anything he could do at the hospital. Jake went on home and we made day arrangements for Halle. I was so thankful for Amber, Sarah Mc, Sarah Redecker, Michelle, Grandma and Amy for making Halle's days special. She really didn't understand why Mommy and Brantley couldn't come home so this helped keep her mind off of things.

I have to say that the RMH was absolutely amazing. Each day a group would come in and cook lunch and dinner for the people staying. I spent most of my days in the room with Brantley. I liked the setup because each room was private with a recliner and a couch. The first day was the worst. They didn't have anything to report. Brantley was hungry but they wouldn't give him food because they were afraid he would asperate. They did insert a feeding tube but would only give him .5 oz. In the full term nursery he was taking 1.5 oz. The poor baby was hungry and that is how I had to leave him the first night. I didn't sleep. I was up every couple of hours. I was in lots of pain still...swollen terribly...and I knew my baby was hungry. It was the most helpless feeling in the world. I just cried. My mom said, "Do you want to go on over?" It was 3:00 a.m. I knew there wasn't anything I could do for him shy of hijacking a formula cabinet and taking matters into my own hands. It was best that I didn't go over there until morning.

By morning (Wednesday), they had upped his intake to 1 oz because he was STARVING!! By the afternoon they stopped giving him his formula through the feeding tube and let me feed him through the bottle. I was sooo happy. They left his feeding tube in just in case they needed it and he was still on IV for fluids and antibiotics.

Thursday afternoon I actually spoke with the doctor. He seemed pleased with his progress but still thought we would be there until Saturday. He really encouraged breastfeeding. Up until this point I hadn't been able to nurse because of the issues and my milk hadn't come in. He told me I was making excuses and that Baby would much rather nurse that drink from a bottle. I could tell this doctor was very adament that he nurse so I sucked it up that evening and got him to nurse for 30 minutes. They took his feeding tube out and his IV. I was a very happy momma!

The next morning (Friday) he nursed again for 30 minutes. When the doctor made his rounds that afternoon he asked us when we were ready to go home and we said, "TODAY!" He said, "Okay!"

We never really got any more answers than what we were told on the first day. I really think everything they did for him was all precautionary. He still does the weird breathing thing when he eats but other than that it seems to be getting better. They told us he would grow out of it as his lungs matured.

It was a very emotional week! I was never so excited to get home. We surprised Halle. She thought Jake was bringing her up to spend the night and they were going to bring us home Saturday. She was so excited when she opened the door and we were standing there!

Friday night storms started up in St. Charles/St. Louis area. Jake went to bed around 8 knowing he would probably be getting a call to work the outages. He got the call around 3 a.m. and was gone by 4. We didn't see him until the following Wednesday. There is nothing quite like being thrown into parenting 2 all by yourself on day one.

I can honestly say I've had the LONGEST 11 days of my life and I hope I never have to endure it again! :)

Brantley's Birth Story

On Friday, May 24, I had my last check up with Dr. Menges. When I went in, I had high blood pressure and traces of protein in my urine (which are both signs of preeclampsyia.) So, they sent me home with orders to do a 24 hour urine analysis on Monday (Memorial Day) and periodically check my blood pressure. If my BP got to 160/90 or above I was told to go straight to the hospital. On Saturday, May 25, we literally lounged around the house all day. I had no energy and all I really wanted to do was sleep or have the baby. Jake and I took Halle to Engler park and we went for a walk hoping that it would help get things going. He really wanted me to have Brantley on this weekend because that meant he wouldn't have to take off an extra day of work! :) I was scheduled to be induced on Thursday, May 30 if he did not come before.

Once we got back from the park on Saturday we all took a nap. When I got up my blood pressure was 156/80. My normal BP is normally VERY low. So, this concerned me a bit. I layed back down on the couch for 30 minutes to see if I could get it to come down. When I checked it again it was 174/90. I freaked out and called my doctor to see what I should do. She told me to go on into the hospital to be on the safe side.

We took Halle over to Jason and Sarah's house to spend the night. We got to the hospital around 7:30 p.m. When we got to the hospital they checked my BP and said it was normal. It was still running in the 140s which is incredibly high for me. But, they didn't know that. They kept me for 3 hours on observation and ended up sending us home around 11:30 p.m. We checked with Halle to see if she wanted to come home and she said she wanted to stay the night.

We got home around 12:30 a.m.

Around 2 a.m. I woke up needing to go to the bathroom. This was normal for me. I was usually up 2-3 times a night. I layed back down and started having contractions. I woke Jake up and told him I was having contractions and I would let him know if I thought we needed to go back up. He went back to sleep. I tried to go back to sleep and forget about the pain I was in but they kept coming anywhere between 2-5 minutes apart. I finally decided to get up and maybe try moving around to see if it helped. I cleaned up the kitchen and switched loads of laundry. I went back to the couch and "tried" once again to forget about the pain. The contractions seemed to stop a little while I was laying on my side on the couch. When I stood up to walk back to bed I couldn't move from the pain. I slowly walked back to the bedroom and and got back in bed. I began timing my contractions and trying hard not to breathe too hard to wake up Jake. It was 3:30 a.m. and I knew he would need to get some sleep to drive us back up to the hospital. My plan was to wait until 5 a.m. to head back up. Around 4 a.m. I couldn't take it anymore. I decided that I needed to wake him up to let him know that I really thought I was in labor. I still wanted to try to wait it out a little bit but he bounced right up and said, "Let's just go now. Even if it stops and we have to turn back around...I promise I won't be mad." I think he was a little worried about the drive and especially being Memorial Day Weekend...Cops were everywhere!

It was the longest hour and 15 minutes to Mercy Hospital. I watched the clock the entire time...breathing through each contraction. It was so early that I didn't want to call anyone. (although I was certain I was in labor, I wanted to wait as long as possible just in case they sent me back home) I had texted Amber around 2:00 when the pains started so she already had a heads up. When we got to Herky it was around 5 a.m. so I decided I probably needed to call my mom.

At one point, I asked Jake if he was getting nervous. I was being pretty dramatic in the passenger seat...rightfully so! He said, "No, I am doing good...I just don't want to get pulled over. Although it would be just like the movies if we did. I could honestly say...My wife is in labor!" LOL!!

We made it back just 5 hours after being discharged and the same nurse was working at the front desk. I really wanted to punch her in the face when she started correcting my breathing. She kept saying, "Short breaths...he,he,he,he" I am pretty sure she wanted me to hyperventilate because everyone knows you don't do SHORT BREATHS WHEN YOU ARE IN LABOR!! In through your nose and out through your mouth...DUH! She did make a comment, "You changed shirts!" LOL! Ummm...Yeah...now get me to my room lady! Literally every 2 minutes my contracions were coming and whatever I was doing I had to stop to breathe through the pain. They finally brought me a wheelchair and as I sat down in the chair, my water broke! I always wanted to have my water break on its own. I had always heard stories about it and I knew that once it broke there was no turning back...there would be a baby within 24 hours!

We got into the room and the nurse kept asking me all the same questions they asked just 5 hours prior. The one that really got me was, "Have you ever thought about hurting yourself or others?" This question came right in the middle of a very painful contraction. But, I answered, "NO!" Eventhough I really wanted to hurt her at that very moment. I really believe that this nurse was still "in-training" or she was at the end of her shift and didn't want to start my IV...because she blew my vain. I yelled, "Oh dear GOD!" I have no issues with needles. I can give blood any time and I can even watch the needle going in. But, this HURT!! I looked at Jake and he gave me this, "Would you stop it!" look... LOL! I couldn't help it. I was so aggravated at this woman!

Her shift was over and we got two nurses that were very happy! Dr. Menges called me on the phone to see how I was doing. I asked her when I could get my epidural and she said whenever I want! As soon as I got off the phone I ordered my EPI! There is no way I could go through that without meds. I'm not really sure why any woman would but hey--more power to them! I had an epi with Halle and it numbed everything from the waist down. But, with this one I was able to still move my feet and legs. I was very happy with this because I knew I would be able to feel to push. They gave me a pain button to push and throughout the day when I would forget to push it, I had my coaches (Amber, Mom & Courtney) pushing it for me!

I was dialated to a 7 by 1:00 p.m. and I was stuck there. They had me turn on my right side (because that was the way the baby was happy) and I had to use this peanut shaped ball thing to try to help get me to progress more. Around 5ish, they checked me again and I had made it to an 8.5. Dr. Menges ordered a very small dose of pitocin to get the contractions to get a little harder and get me the rest of the way.

She came in a little before 6:00 p.m. We made a goal to have him here within 30 minutes of pushing. She joked about covering up her scrubs because she didn't want to mess up her outfit. I just love her! I think we had him here within 32 minutes. Not too far off from our goal. He made his grand entrance into the world at 6:29 p.m. He weighed 8lbs. 4oz. 20 inches long.


I look awful here...but I guess it is acceptable since I just gave birth! :)

Dr. Menges

One of my favorites (He was screaming bloody murder but when Jake started talking to him he stopped and just looked at him) He knew his Daddy's voice!!

It is almost time!

It is so hard to believe that Brantley will be here in exactly one week! Life is going to be SO different for us. I'm looking forward to this new adventure but I also find myself getting a little nervous to start all over again. I forget how expensive babies are. I spoke with Brantley's baby sitter yesterday. I've been so spoiled with Bright Beginnings. We never had to pay during the summer and she always held our spot. But, now with our new sitter we have to suck it up and pay whether he goes or not. :( I'm glad Halle will be starting Kindergarten in the fall. I am very thankful the timing worked out perfectly. Otherwise we would be paying for two in daycare! YIKES!

This pregnancy has been so different from Halle. As I reflect over the past 9 months, I can't think of anything that stands out to be just awful! I remember when I was carrying Halle how miserable I got at the end. The last 5 weeks were just torture! The swelling was awful and my weight gain was disgusting! This time around I was sick a little longer at the beginning but overall I have nothing at all to complain about. I have almost NO swelling now at 38 weeks. My poor feet were pretty bad those last couple of weeks of working but since we have been off from school they almost look normal! The only thing that I could possibly complain about is my sleeping. It is so uncomfortable and I am up at least 3 times a night going to the bathroom. I know this is all normal and it is definitely preparing me for what lies ahead (middle of the night feedings). I just can't wait to actually wake up to a cute little baby instead of the aches and pains! LOL!

Some things I am looking foward to after next week:

Sleeping on my stomach
Losing the baby weight
Exercising
Wearing Cute Clothes again
Wearing Cute Shoes again
Walking Normal (No More Waddle)
Sleeping Comfortably
Seeing my normal skinny feet
Bending over without my huge belly getting in the way
No more Nose bleeds
Being able to do everyday chores without getting tired
Having energy again

Things my husband is looking forward to after next week:

He won't have to be the only one changing the litter box
I can work in the yard with him spreading mulch (Fun, Fun!)
NO MORE SNORING! (He hopes...;)) LOL! Apparently I snore awful right now!

Mother's Day--The difference a year can make!

When I woke up this morning, memories of last Mother's Day flooded my mind.

I was starting to feel overwhelmed because we had just about hit our 1 year mark TTC. I was an emotional wreck. It absolutely consumed every ounce of me. I researched on the internet daily. I read book after book and tried everything possible. My poor husband was swallowing 6 "horse-sized" pills a day because I read somewhere that it would help. I believed in my heart that God had a plan for our lives and I knew it had to include another baby. But, I was getting weary...and even a little bitter at times. I felt like my prayer was never going to get answered and I even found myself not praying about it anymore. I knew that God had heard my prayer. He knew my heart and I just needed to be still.

Fast forward two months later to my niece's birthday party. Still not pregnant and it was just announced that my brother and his wife were expecting their 4th child. It was all I could do not to fall apart in front of everyone. I did my best to keep it together until I got in the car and Jake asked me if I was o.k. I wasn't o.k. and I tried very hard to not let bitterness consume me. Unfortunately it did for awhile. I was always close with my sister-in-law but now we had this barrier between us. I will never forget something that Jake said in the car on the way home from that birthday party. He said, "Krista, just because we can't have a baby doesn't mean that everyone else around us should stop." I knew he was right but I was just hurting. I was surrounded by pregnant women and I didn't know how to deal with the emotions and pain of it all.

Two months later we found out on September 25 that we were expecting.

And now, just a few weeks away from welcoming our sweet baby boy. I knew God would answer our prayer one day and I am so thankful that He did.

Today, I feel incredibly blessed and not deserving of this miracle we are about to meet. I find myself thinking about all of my friends who are still facing this huge mountain in their lives. I remember the pain just as if it were yesterday. My prayers are for each and every one of them to get their miracle! My hope and prayer is that next Mother's Day they will each get to wake up to the sound of a crying baby or pains in their hips (like me)to remind them of the prayer that was finally answered.

Happy Mother's Day, in faith, to all my sisters who are still praying and believing!

Fair Weather Super Bowl Fans

It's Superbowl Sunday! How many people are celebrating with hot wings & yummy snacks today? We are...However, we aren't huge Superbowl Fans. Very seldom does a football game even get turned on in our house. I know, I know...how American is that? Now, I do very much enjoy high school football but my husband is not much of a football fan at all. It has always been hard for me to understand how a person doesn't like to watch football of any sorts. I guess because I was raised in a "football loving" home. But, I think I finally have an understanding of where Jake's thoughts come from.

I've been thinking about writing a blog post about this since last Wednesday night when Jake was preaching to our youth group along with Harvest youth. He said something that keeps playing over and over in my mind and he said it again this morning at church while closing out the service.

He said, "We are expecting a baby boy in just a few months. While most Dads get excited about their Boy being the next superstar football player or baseball player, I can't help but want my son to be the next generation changer above all else. A person who follows after the heart of God. A person who wins souls to Christ. That is my dream for my son."

Jake didn't play sports in high school. So, I guess it is easy to understand why he is not a sports fanatic. But, I absolutely love that our prayer, even at this stage in his life, is for him to be a generation changer for Christ. I was sitting in church this morning watching him read his Bible. He had scripture highlighted and he was showing it to a friend of ours. I thought to myself...I am so blessed to be married to a man of God. A person who has knowledge of the word but is also always willing learn more. I am also incredibly blessed to be surrounded by so many wonderful friends who share our faith. Our Friday & Saturday nights consist of hosting youth at our house and Bible studies. While this is not what I had daydreamed as a life when I was in high school, I am so thankful that God knew best! I can't imagine life turning out any other way!

I am forever greatful for all the blessings God has showered us with in our 6 years of marriage. I can't imagine what else He has in store!!

"Only Child Synodrome"

I read a saying just recently that I will paraphrase because I can't remember exactly word for word what it said. It went a long the lines of...if your child is wanting you to give them attention...Play Candy Land, make Necklaces, Play Barbies, stop what you are doing and give them 5 minutes. And they will give you an hour and 5 minutes in return, for you to do what you want.

This little saying kind of hit home to me. I don't know how many times Halle has asked me to play with her and my response 90% of the time is..."Hang on a second!" or "As soon as I finish _________." I always feel guilty because unlike all of her cousins she doesn't have anybody to play with or anybody to entertain her...except for me and Jake. She is not a child who entertains herself. It is hard for me to understand this because I was a child who liked being by myself. Sure, I loved playing with my brothers but I also really liked playing in my room by myself with Barbies and Baby Dolls. Not my Bug! She NEVER leaves my side. If I am in the kitchen, she is underfoot ready to help! Don't get me wrong, I love my little sidekick but things are quickly about to change for her. I guess in a way I am glad she isn't going to have the "Only Child Syndrome" much longer. She is used to getting her way. She is used to having ALL of the attention ALL of the time. She is demanding in EVERY way! I know I am making my child seem like a monster...really she is not. I believe she is just like every other Only Child.

So, I've tried this little theory out while at home with her for the past week. It actually holds some truth. I don't know if I got an entire hour and 5 minutes but I know she was satisfied for quite awhile. I am making it my mission to drop whatever I am doing and give her some of the attention she is so desperately wanting...afterall, her world will be changing in about 5 months...for the better, of course!! I just hope she sees it that way. ;)

Woody Wilson is on the way!!!

At my 12 week ultrasound, the technician was scanning over all the parts and I was asking LOTS of questions. I decided to do the genetic testing and I kind of knew some of the questions to ask. My best friend had a child with anencephaly and my nephew has downs. A lot of people disagree with these series of tests. I guess I understand if your whole intent was to terminate the pregnancy but I just simply wanted to know. It didn't matter what the results said, I would carry the baby to term! My results came in today and everything was NEGATIVE...PraisetheLORD!!

So, at my 12 week scan I was pretty sure I saw something...as in a little boy part! So, I asked..."What exactly are we looking at?" She had two images on the screen. One arms and one legs. And there was definitely something between the legs! She said, "Don't go paint the nursery but I am pretty sure your husband is going to be happy!" I didn't want to tell anybody because I really wanted to do the big reveal. Jake thinks the reveal thing is stupid...but I thought it was fun!

I wasn't very good and the "secret" thing. People ask WAY too many questions! "What do you think you are having?" I'd immediately say "Boy"...Once I got it confirmed people would ask, "What does Jake think?" As if I am going to fall for that one! hehe...sure everyone knew that Daddy would love to have a boy! So, I tried to play it off. Not sure if anybody fell for it. It seemed like most everyone guessed boy. I had a few girl voters.

I was pretty sure that we were going to have another girl when I first found out we were expecting. Without going into details...Medically speaking...everything pointed to girl. I am still in awe of our wonderful God and His miraculous ways!! This past spring,I blogged about a particular day when we were told that God had showed a friend of ours a little boy playing in our living room. At the time, I didn't care at all if the whole boy thing was correct...I just wanted a baby so bad and I remember feeling so overwhelmed with peace. Now, looking back I shouldn't be shocked at all that we are expecting a boy. Afterall, our entire testimony is pretty unbelievable!!

So, for now we will refer to our little bundle of joy as Woody. Chosen by big sister, Halle! I believe Woody Wilson has a great ring to it!! :)