Bittersweet

Today has been a day filled with mixed emotions. It started this morning with a text from my sister-in-law, Amber. Amber's grandmother has not been in great health for awhile now. The family was told that she wouldn't make it much longer. (I tried very hard to keep it together in my classroom full of kids) ******************************************************************************************** Gigi is loved by everyone!! She has this smile that can light up a room! She has so much love in her heart for her husband, children, grandchildren, great grandchildren...and extended family (that's me!) We were all close to GiGi. She was funny and made me laugh every time I was around her...which was quite a bit!! But, I think the best quality she had was that she loved Jesus and shared Him with everyone she loved!! This afternoon I got a phone call from my other sister-in-law, Sarah Wilson. She and Jason were on their way to Children's hospital with their baby, Jonah. Please keep him in your prayers. He has down syndrome and is experiencing some health issues. She needed me to take Riley home with me. After I got off the phone with Sarah, Amber texted me back to see if I could take her three kids home with me so she could go be with her grandma. Aunt Krista GLADLY took all the nieces and nephews home!! I love those kiddos!! ************************************************************************************* Jake and I were sitting down eating dinner. I had just told him that I was waiting on a text from a coworker and that I was so excited to find out if she was hired as a TEACHER next year. I could tell it went in one ear and out the other...you know how you can tell that? Anyway, I got the text and she told me she got hired! I literally screamed! Jumped out of my seat in excitement! Jake thought I was absolutely nuts...as a matter of fact he said..."You are nuts!" But, I was so excited for her! It's been a long time coming!! :) She is such a great person! So deserving of a teaching position! ***************************************************************************************** Literally 2 minutes later I got this text from Amber, "She's with Jesus." I went from rejoicing for my friend...to rejoicing for GiGi. It is so hard to let go of people we love. But, when they have that faith in Christ we know that they are so much better off. She is not suffering anymore. She is sitting at the feet of our maker! What a wonderful image!! We tend to be selfish because we want our loved ones to be with us on Earth. But, I told Amber instead of being selfish we can just be "jealous." Because she is ultimately where we all hope to end up! We love you GiGi!! Jake and I absolutely adored you! I will keep you forever in my heart until we meet again...:) Please be in prayer for the entire Carr family!!

They say children can see angels...

What a beautiful day!! Jake was called in to work today because of these treacherous winds! After Halle's nap we decided to go outside and enjoy the sunshine!! I worked on trimming our "out of control" bushes while Halle played in her sandbox. I kept checking on her and when I looked up I realized she had wandered off further away. She was down by the broken bird bath that probably needs to be hauled away. As I stood there watching her play I thought to myself, "Grandma Jean would have absolutely adored that little girl." I went down to check out what she was doing and I noticed the broken bird bath was a cherub. It reminded of the ones my Grandma collected (Dreamsicles). I'd venture to say she had every last one of them! My Grandpa Wallen would've made sure of it!! :) As I walked away I overheard Halle say, "Ah! The spiders are going to get my granddaughter!" Coincidence? I don't think so! ***You know, they say that children can see angels. I don't doubt that Grandma Jean was right there with Halle as she played around the little cherub!*** ***Grandma, I miss you more now than ever! I can't wait to see your face one day and give you a great big hug!! And most of all, I can't wait to share your beautiful Great Granddaughter with you!!*** And THAT was my favorite part of the day!!

Freshman 15

I love to eat!! It's in my blood. When I was little my cousins and I would always go to my Grandma Pat's house. Inevitably, we would always end up at General Custard's. We joke about it all the time and it is a funny memory that we all have together!! My love for food started very young!! I was always warned about the "Freshmen 15." I was told to be very careful when I went away to college because 15 lbs. would creep up on you, bite you on the butt, and hang on for dear life! So, I made it through college just fine. I didn't actually go away to college so maybe that had something to do with it. I pretty well stayed the same weight until I was 20. Then, I got my first teaching job in Steelville. I moved away from my family, friends and my boyfriend (My hubby). It was a very stressful time in my life. First year of teaching is ALWAYS stressful! I totally understood why they say to "never get married" or "never have a baby" during the first year of teaching. Thankfully, I wasn't at the point of marriage or baby at that time in my life. Instead, I dealt with being the "outsider" in a small community, learning a new job (Reading Recovery), being away from everybody I loved, and the many ups and downs in my relationship! Instead of gaining the dreaded 15...I lost about 20 lbs. It was the smallest I'd ever been in my life. I was in my friend, Jessica's wedding as a bridesmaid and my dress was a size 4. Unbelievable to imagine that now!! HA HA!! So, fast forward 7 years...marriage and a baby... I've finally put on that "Freshman 15..." I guess I can blame it on this horrible winter...but truth is, I had no discipline at all this winter. I stopped going to the gym and had way too many snow days to bake and eat!! I could blame it on almost 30...but, I know too many people who look great in their 30's!! Ugh!! So, it's all me!! When I got home today I wanted to eat something. Instead of eating, I started cleaning. I guess that is my relief! Throw myself into cleaning and maybe I'll just forget about it. I want to know your secrets!! What does everybody do to keep their mind off of food? Drink water? Clean? I've been eating healthy (don't like to say diet) since Sunday and I'm down 3 lbs. Well, I guess I better get going. Halle is offering me McDonald's French Fries (Pretend food). How ironic?!? Gotta go play with her!! :)

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

"Actions speak louder than words"

This saying keeps coming to mind tonight and I feel the need to blog about it. In school, we teach our students Character Education. It starts in Kindergarten. I know at Central Elementary we do an outstanding job teaching these character ed words like: honesty, caring, respect, friendship, responsibility, giving, etc.

This week we had the vocabulary word "noble." My students didn't know what it meant but when I explained it to them they seemed to "get it." I'm not saying that ALL of my students apply these characteristics in everyday life but they are definitely learning life lessons that they are going to be able to take with them.

The choices we make in our everyday life are going to come with some sort of consequence. Whether it be something we buy on a credit card (hello, interest!) or forgetting to pay a bill (No water or electric...how did that happen?) or accidently posting something inappropriate to Facebook....there will be a consequence. It's time to own the choices that we make and stop making excuses!

Your actions, my friend, speak louder than your words! What you do (how you live your life) is going to speak more volume to a stranger on the street than a million words that you have to say.

So, I leave you with this...."What are your actions speaking?"

Anger Management

I've always found myself freaking out about mixing the Play-Doh colors. Tonight, I got a revelation while we were playing with our Play-Doh. Why does it matter if Halle mixes the colors? As you can see she mixed the colors and it made a beautiful Tye-Dye!! :)

Don't sweat the small stuff right?

When it comes to parenting I will never tell you that I've got it all figured out. Having a 2 year old home ALL day...especially with all of these snow days... can be very wearing on a person. Hats off to all you stay-at-home moms. I have found myself getting angry at Halle for smooshing cupcake all over the table and slinging lettuce and cheese all over the clean kitchen floor. I get aggravated at the messes she makes with all of her toys. She just doesn't understand that we should put one toy away before we get out another. DUH!! That's when I have to slap myself and realize we are talking about a TWO year old. Two year olds are supposed to make messes!

I have to constantly remind myself that it's all about the way I react...and to react in a way that is appropriate for her age!!

Halle has a MAJOR attitude...quite possibly borderline bratty at times...she has to get her way...and when she wants something, she wants it NOW! I guess she gets that part honestly. From what I hear I was a pretty demanding child. Today she wanted to watch a TV show on my phone. I was trying to pack in wood from the garage to keep the fire going and I told her to wait just a minute until I was done. She started in with the attitude. I immediately stopped what I was doing and said, with my finger pointed, "You listen to me right now....blah, blah, blah..." Her eyes got very big and she stopped. I finished by saying, "Do you understand me?" As if I were talking to my 2nd Graders. She walked into the other room and a few seconds later she said, "Mom, I am really sorry." It melted my heart a little. AND it worked! I got through to her this time!!

I find myself sometimes having to take a deep breathe and even walking out of the room at times. I have to constantly remind myself that I am raising a 2 year old...and to treasure the times of smooshing cupcakes. I have to remind myself to treasure the hundreds of times I hear, "Mom, will you play with me?" or "I want to hold you!" There is nothing in my house that needs to be done bad enough to neglect these precious moments.

Disobedient

It's been way too long since my last post. It has been a crazy few months!!



Today was my first day back to school in two weeks. It was sad to see Christmas break come to an end but at the same time I was very excited to get back into the routine of things. It almost felt like the first day of school all over again. I moved classrooms over Christmas break. It was a stressful couple of days but everything came together and was ready on time! All of the kids were so excited about the new room, bathrooms and gym. I think everyone was pretty excited about it all!!



We only work two days this week so there is really no use in trying to start anything new. So, while writing lesson plans this week I decided to review a skill we had previously talked about...Prefixes. I know...boring, boring. BORING!! But, as I was teaching the prefixes Dis- and Un- a word popped up on the board and it really stuck with me all day.



The word was DISOBEY. To disobey means FAILURE to obey. I deal with disobedience every single day...with my students, with Halle and even myself. Being disobedient brings nothing but FAILURE!



Today I asked my class to walk in a straight line. (Keep in mind this is Elementary students) Our new hallway has a gray line so the kids can walk on it and keep orderly. Almost immediately I had a couple of students who jumped off the line...just to be funny...I'm sure of it. But, it was being DISOBEDIENT nonetheless.



Halle chooses to be disobedient daily. I'm sure it is part of being 2. But, when I tell her not to do something she likes to see what kind of reaction she can get out of me (good or bad) so she does it anyway. DISOBEDIENT



ME: I have to say that I am working very hard on being obedient. Mostly to my heavenly father because that is really the one person I have to answer to. I don't want to disappoint God. I know in 2010 I brought Him lots of disappointment. I chose to do things MY way many times instead of just listening to Him.



A few weeks ago Jake and I made a very difficult decision to leave the church we called "home" for as long as we both could remember. The church he youth pastored for 5 years. The church that we both grew up in as kids. I know you are probably wondering, "Why?" My only answer is OBEDIENCE. We both felt God was pulling us in a different direction. We don't really know why yet but we are certain that we are walking in God's will for our christian walk. I know there is a reason we are where we are now. There is a ministry we will both be able to be used in. I am certain that we are needed somewhere. It is just a matter of waiting now. I'm thinking the word next should be PATIENCE!! :)



We will continue to wait on Him!!

In Christ, there are no Goodbye

It's been a pretty emotional week. I'm sure everyone reading this knows that my friend, Courtney had her precious Ella on Monday. I'm so glad she allowed me to be a part of her day. What a joy it was to share with my friend that bittersweet day. I think we all prepared ourselves as best as possible given the situation. But, I will never forget sitting in the waiting room the moment we got the text message that read...3lbs. 11 oz. 15 in. long. Nobody breathed! All that was going through my mind was "how is everyone?" Not too long after that (but seemed like an eternity) the nurse came in to get Brighton, Lily and Lilah (Ella's siblings). We waited for them to come back and then sent the grandparents in. Finally, it was my turn! I went it to see them really not knowing what to expect. And what I saw was Courtney (beautiful as ever) holding this beautiful little baby girl! When I looked at Ella, I saw perfection! She had a beautiful hat on and a tiny little outfit that read, "Little Sister." That baby girl has made more of an impact in her short time on Earth than most people that live long lives. And what awesome parents Ella was blessed with!! What an awesome friend I was blessed with!! God sure does know what He is doing when he puts two people in the same paths. I can't wait for the day when I make it to heaven and get to hold her in my arms again!! I'm sure I will have to fight her momma and daddy for the chance. Oh what a day that will be!!



What I am struggling with is this...I have had countless people send me messages and text me, "Is there anything I can do?" I don't know what to say because I struggle with that myself..."What can I do to ease the pain?" Too bad there is not a Book of Life that tells you step-by-step instructions on how to be a good friend and what to do in tragic situations.

I want Courtney to know that I am here for her. I believe she knows that I love her and that I am here for her NO MATTER what! I would do anything for that family!! I think prayers are about the only thing that can help mend broken hearts. And I have prayed nonstop!!

On another note...

My Grandpa Wallen passed away on Ella's day. He was a great man of God!! He was the kindest person I knew. My Grandma Jean loved him very much! And he made her so happy the last years of her life. I got the message early in the morning on Tuesday. Jake came into the bathroom and I was just standing there sobbing. He said, "What's wrong with you?" When I told him what happened he said, "I'm sorry." I told him it was tears of joy. Grandpa was so ready to be with Jesus. I was overwhelmed with emotion as I thought of the reunion between him, his son (Randy), his wife (Wanda) and my Grandma Jean. What a glorious day that was!!


All that comes to mind right now is this song...